16 May, 2013

You Asked For It: Destination Roundup 1


Cute bird friend I made at the beach...
It seems as though I awakened the beast with my last post about destination weddings.  You lovelies have been peppering my inbox with your insightful questions and I thought a roundup might be a good idea.  

How do I get my dress there unharmed?
You have a few options.  First, you can make the arrangements with your airline ahead of time.  Just ring them and explain your situation clearly and thoroughly.  I guarantee you won’t be the first bride to ask that question.  Or, if your dress fits carry-on requirements, take it with you.  First class cabins often have ‘garment closets’ that passengers can use to store coats…you could ask to use one of those. If these options are less than ideal, ship your dress to your destination prior to your arrival.  Again, you’ll need to call your resort and make arrangements.  You should ship your dress in a large box wrapped in tissue paper to help the dress hold its shape.  Pay for insurance and if you can, get a confirmation from the resort.  It will be your job to follow up…don’t put it on resort staff to do your work for you.  A word of advice: It will be expensive to ship your dress properly.  Do not cut corners to save money.  This is NOT the ideal place to look for savings.  Finally, whichever method you choose, make an appointment to have your dress steamed when you arrive.

Any tips for dealing with stress before the big day?
Yes.  First, don’t take your feelings out on your bridal party or resort staff.  Deal with the situation yourself and do it calmly and politely.  Being belligerent or rude will not solve anything and will more than likely escalate the situation.   If you just simply can’t deal, send a neutral party with a clear head and poise under pressure on your behalf.  Either way, take a minute to breathe, count to ten, do a quick calming exercise and then handle your biz like a boss.  

You mentioned family on the Honeymoon and now I’m freaking out.  I love my fam, but don’t want to be smothered by them the whole time…what should I do?
You can start by not assuming that everyone will want to spend every waking moment with you.  These are adults, they’ve attended weddings before.  Your privacy is implied.  But, yes, if you need to set boundaries, set them.  However, you should do this tactfully (after all the support and love, I’d hate to see feelings hurt) and gently.  It may sound cliché, but rehearse what you’re going to say BEFORE something asinine comes spilling out your cake hole.  Try something like: We’re so grateful for everything you’ve done for us and we’re so glad you’ll be joining us, but we’re hoping to spend some quality time alone after this is all over.  We can’t wait to start our lives together and this Honeymoon is going to be such a great way to begin! Never underestimate the power of brevity.  Also, let me say this: if you’re going to set boundaries, set the same ones for everyone. 

A reminder to stay hydrated and relaxed!

When should our invites go out?
Okay.  This is an easy one.  You should prepare to send out Save the Dates 1O-12 months ahead of time.  Include the date (obvi) and the location.  This will prepare your guests for what’s coming and they can begin to browse flights and resort info.  Please include this line on your save the dates: Formal invitation to follow. It is also appropriate to include a card with a link to your wedding website, should you have one.  Your invite should follow 4-6 months prior to the wedding.  In it, you can include more resort info, airport code, travel advice, itinerary, etc.  Your goal is to make this as smooth and easy for guests as possible.

Do we need to plan things for guests to do?  Like what about a rehearsal dinner or a party to welcome everyone?
I think it’s nice to make guests feel special.  Especially since they’ve traveled so far afield.  A little get together is a great way for everyone to get to know each other.  That vibe can really enhance the entire experience.  Maybe you could make a rezzie at the restaurant in the resort and just be together.  Good food, great drinks and lots of conversation…paradise, indeed!  Overall though, I don’t think tons of activities are necessary.

Wow!  I think we have enough content for a little series, don’t you?  Tomorrow, I’ll answer more questions and on Monday, let’s talk apparel…


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