Living Authentically: Dealing With Disappointment

Another post bringing you small business realness!  I wish I could share the details with you, but since there are a few other people involved, I'll just give you the basics for now.  Oh, also.  Since I didn't think you wanted to see pictures of me looking wistfully out of a window at the rain, I thought I'd let the GoldiPets telegraph my emotional journey for you! xoxo-E

'Disappointment' as portrayed by Rosemarie Paisley.

For the last couple of weeks, I have been working extremely hard on a project.  It was more of a concept or expansion  project than a design project.  I poured lots of extra hours into it and, even more importantly, I poured a lot of emotion into it.  I sketched, I outlined, I worked and reworked, I budgeted, re-budgeted...you get the idea.  After two really positive meetings (one over the phone and one in person) and a number of positive e-mails, I really thought this was to be the break I'd been looking for.  After we'd scheduled our next meeting, I left feeling amazing!  I felt brilliant, untouchable, energized and a million other things.  I immediately got started on the homework we'd scheduled for ourselves and by the next morning I had some results to share....and I didn't hear anything.  All day.  I felt like something was off.  Then, at 11:00p, I finally saw the e-mail.  It was not good.  Plans had changed and I found myself unceremoniously cut out. I was reeling.  I immediately thought of all the ideas I'd given so freely over which I would now have very little ownership.  All the plans I'd shared about my own brand. I'll admit, I had a good cry.  A whole new wave of emotion washed over me as I began to deal with this new information.  Above everything, I was so heartbroken and disappointed.

'Reflection' featuring Roxie Mae.

I took the evening to marinate in my crankiness and look for support from The Hubbs.  Sadly, his helpful, rational input just made everything worse, so I said, "Just let me have my feelings!"  All in all, I handled it pretty well...  The next day, after I'd had some perspective and more chats with Hubbs and a couple friends, what was said started to make lots of sense.  So, I reevaluated and I was able to pull out some positive points:

1.  Working on a new challenge gave me the chance to clearly lay out some goals that had otherwise been a little vague.  I got to see the light at the end of the tunnel, friends!

2.  I had the chance to have a frank discussion with The Hubbs about what we are and are not willing to commit to, both in terms of working relationships and fiscal responsibility.

3.  I have so much more to share with you and now I have a plan on how to do that!

4.  Baby's got some small business skillz (yes, with a 'z'), yo.  Whew! What a load off!

Disappointment is such a dirty word, isn't it?  We're not encouraged to inflict it on other people and we spend an immeasurable amount of time avoiding it ourselves.  And when it does happen to us, we're supposed to "suck it up", "get over it" and realize, "hey, it could be worse".  Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying one should wallow in their misfortune to the extent that it clouds one's judgement.  I just think it's super important to allow yourself time to mourn your lost opportunity.  Then, once your feelings are clearer, you can pull out all the things you've learned and move forward stronger and better equipped to handle the next challenge.

'Hopeful Optimism' by Rosemarie Paisley.

In case you're wondering, her little snout is covered in pollen from devouring several flowers.  She may be a flower thief, but she's a great emotion model!!

File This Under "Holy, Cow!": Liebster Blogging Award

So, yesterday I received a tweet letting me know that my friend Sun Torke had nominated me for a Liebster Blogging Award!  This award is meant for blogs that you love, that mean something to you.  This award is also intended for rising star blogs with a smaller readership.  Yay, Goldiblog! Nominees must answer 11 questions about themselves, add 11 facts about themselves, create 11 new questions and nominate 11 new blogs.  Then you link up with the person that nominated you.  Easy peasy!

 My friend Sun, as you know, writes for Eat. Host. Run. Style.  You'll remember her for the great post she did here!  Sun's post remains one of the most read on this blog! This is one of my favorite fitness blogs to read.  She makes fitness fun and accessible.  I never feel like I'm doing something wrong or like I should be ashamed of myself for not doing more, faster.  Or better.  Just a really great read.  Superb recipes, too!

Here goes!

Sun's questions for me, are:

1. Why did you decide to start blogging?  I love parties and event design.  This blog started as a way for me to exchange ideas with people all over the world.  I really wanted this space to be an honest chronicle of my journey as an owner of a creatively based business as well as a testament to all the amazing things that inspire us. 
2. How did you decide on your blog's name? This blog began as a wedding blog, but began to evolve as my business model evolved.  As Goldiluxe Events became busier, I wanted it to reflect my vision for my company.  I can look at it and be instantly reminded of what I'm aiming to do.
3. What are your top five favorite foods? Miso soup, spaghetti squash, pancakes, rainier cherries, and spinach fritata.
4. If you could have any superpower, what would it be? I would love the ability to stop time.
5. What's the best gift you ever received? When I was in my very early 20s and moving into my first house with my best friend at the time, my grandma gave me a vacuum.  It made me feel so grown up, like my family finally saw me as a capable, responsible adult.  I was so happy, I burst into tears.
   
   
6. Are there any current style trends that make you cringe? Yes.  Leggings as pants, rompers, and those headbands clearly inspired by Native American headdresses.  Cultural appropriation just isn't cute.
7. Why do you workout and what's your current routine? I love working out because it focuses and clears my mind, relieves my stress and makes me feel strong.  I love being kind to myself.
8. Who is your role model? My Mom and Dad. They have done and given everything to give me every opportunity I could ever want.  I also look up to anyone who lives their life boldly, without fear and without regret.
9. What accomplishment are you most proud of? Graduating college. I learned so much in and out of the classroom.
10. If you could participate in any Olympic sport, which would you pick? Figure skating.  Definitely.  Sparkly outfits, big hair, dancing....it's like they created a sport just for me.
11. Where would you like to travel next? Colorado next spring and Japan for my birthday.
 

Now, for my 11 fun facts:

--> I read the Hunger Games trilogy in one weekend.  All three books.  One weekend.  It was awesome. 

--> I am obsessed with my Japanese photo sharing app, Pick.  I heard about it from a bloggy friend and it's been a great way to help me learn Japanese.  

See how cute it makes your pictures?! Couldn't you just choke on the whimsy?

--> I'm teaching myself Japanese.  It's super hard, but really rewarding.

--> I have a really visceral reaction to fonts.  I can't stand Comic Sans, Papyrus, Vivaldi or any font that looks like "kid" handwriting...I shudder to think.

--> With the exception of Law & Order: Los Angeles, I have not met a cop show I don't like.

--> I love to make up words.  So far my favorite is "romantiplans"

--> I would rather not eat or drink during an outing if it means I don't have to use a public restroom.

--> I want to have All The Antiques.

See?  I would have all of the everything if I could.  Also, more cuteness from Pick.

--> I love brunch.

--> I dislike Bloody Marys and I hate when they are listed as "Bloodies" on menus.

--> The meaner someone is to me; the nicer I am to them.  I like to see how mad they get when they can't get a reaction from me.

My 11 questions:
1.  What do you think is your best personality trait?
2.  When was the last time you laughed so hard your sides hurt?
3.  If you could live in any city in the world, which one would you choose and why? 
4.  What is your least favorite color combination?
5.  What is your favorite way to celebrate an accomplishment?
6.  How do you use social media to enhance your blogging life?
7.  Would you rather host a dinner party or contribute to one at someone else's home?
8.  What is your favorite recipe?
9.  If you could appear on any reality show, which would you choose?
10. What is the one thing in your beauty routine you could not live without?
11.  What is your favorite teen movie?

My nominations are:

Allison C Beilke: Illustrator, Artist

AC!

Lauren Bonk

Cream City Green

I'm afraid I can't quite make eleven.  All the smaller blogs I read have already been nominated.  I'll have to scour my blog roll, I know there are so many great bloggers out there!

A big, huge thanks to Sun for the nom.  I'm so grateful!

 

Living Authentically: If You Don't Blog It, Did it Really Happen?

I have written and rewritten this post at least 10 times.  It's been a reflective experience and I think I am finally to the place where this post makes sense.  

Wow, guys.  Have I had a hectic few weeks!  As most of you know, Country Wedding was on July 14th.  By all accounts, it was a success!  The set up was smooth, the couple loved it, and I made it into my bridesmaid's dress and down the aisle on time.  Best of all, I was surrounded by friends. Beautiful, wonderful, silly, zany friends.  It was literally the best weekend I have had in an immeasurable amount of time.  The only downside was, I keep feeling like I was missing something.  There were photos I didn't take, people I didn't tag, tweets missed, posts left untyped.  The whole time I was enjoying this blissful celebration of love, I found myself feeling guilty.  Guilty for not sharing it with all of you.  Can you believe?!  That got me thinking and asking myself a lot of important questions: When did social media become more important than our social lives?  Are you, my wonderfully loyal and amazingly talented readers entitled to the most precious parts of my life?  Where is the line?

A few of the aforementioned friends in a blurry picture taken in the midst of a belly laugh.

I find I still don't have the answers.  For instance, I did manage to snap this amazing picture of my friends during their first dance as husband as wife.  The lighting, their faces, guests looking on lovingly...le sigh.  As I jumped to post the picture to Instagram, I thought to myself, "Is this really my moment to share?"  I agonized over that little picture, desperately wanting to share with you the gravity and joy of the experience I was having, but ultimately, I decided to save it.  To protect that delicious little morsel from the interwebs.

As a blogger, I know these are not concepts I ponder alone.  I have read numerous posts from smart, accomplished women sharing their dilemmas and offering their advice. I often see myself in their words. There are many schools of thought...all of them valuable.  I have always chosen transparency for Goldiluxe, even when my truth is a bit dark.  I've never once regretted that choice. Maybe I'm feeling like I've opened up a floodgate?  Like now that we've established such honesty, I'm having trouble rebuilding my boundaries? Does that make sense?

 Blooms from my ultra sweet hubby.

I won't bore you with the gory details, but I will say that for me, this summer has been a season of reevaluation. After weeks of feeling guilty, I realized (with the support of some really great friends) that it is okay for me to take a step back, to get my shizz in order and enjoy myself once in awhile.  That I am still a devoted wife, a talented designer and a driven business woman, even if I don't blog everyday.  Even if I'm not tweeting ad nauseum.  Whew!  What a load off, amiright?!

 I want to live my life fully, unbound by the pressures of social media. So what does that mean for this space?  It means that I'll still be honest with you, I still may use a few naughty words here and there, I still may tell you more than you want to know sometimes.  You'll still see all the things you're used to seeing around here.  What this means is that I am giving myself permission to keep some of my moments, my treasures, my life to myself.  To immerse myself in those moments and experiences as they happen.  To enjoy my loved ones when they are standing right in front of me.  I encourage you to do the same.

Tell, me.  How do you cope when the pressures of social media become too much?

In Which I Remember How To Blog

Hello, darlings!
I have been away for so long and I've missed you all terribly.  I've been cray-cray busy, but now that the madness has subsided a bit, I am back in the saddle, ready to charm you with my sweet musings once again!  Seriously, y'all, I have a lot coming up for you.  Here are a few of the highlights!

             Tutorials:
                   candlestick cake stands
                    paper flowers
                   chalkboards
             LOTS of reader questions
             Pictures of Country Wedding (!!)



I hope this will be enough to get me out of the doghouse.  I am picking up the photos from Country Wedding tonight and I am soooo excited!  I can't wait to share!

In Which Shizz Gets Real

I was once asked (rather rudely, I might add) if I ever felt I was being misleading by 'filling up your blog with bunnies, rainbows and cutesy words when everybody knows how much being a small business owner sucks'.  At the time, as you can probably imagine, I chose not to answer this particular inquiry (although I will say that writing about positive, fun things helps me to stay positive...). 


So, this week, as I'm feeling like everything is falling apart, I've decided to 'be real'.  Enjoy.


It’s as if my life’s become a series of blog posts and photo shoots.  When I’m not working, at the gym or on an event, I’m designing events for clients that don’t exist so I don’t lose my edge.  I’m reading blogs, magazines, books, creating a digital presence, practicing my sketching, reaching out to other industry professionals, staying up late to write blog posts (like this one). I’m the one that decides which jobs to take and which ones to decline.  I’ve got a household to run, a marriage to enjoy, not to mention a social life to resurrect-all on top of a full time job.  It.  Never. Stops.

I feel lately like I’m losing my voice.  I feel like my vision for this company I started, this company I love is getting lost in all the compromise and I’m tired.  I’m tired of having to remind myself and everyone else that this is my company.  I’m tired of constantly explaining that this is not a hobby.  This is not a co-op.  This is a business that will help feed my family, help fulfill my dreams.  Some days, I don’t know why I’m doing this.  I don’t know why I can’t just be happy in my little office, with my little paycheck, making someone else’s dreams come true, just like millions of people all over the world.

In a lot of ways I’m extremely lucky.  I’m pursuing my passion.  I have a wonderful husband off whom I can bounce ideas.  He’s interested in helping me create a suitable design space; he talks me off a ledge every time I am an emotional doomsday prepper.  He reminds me to stand up for myself when I feel my vision for Goldiluxe is being threatened.  Without his support, we (Goldiluxe and I) would be screwed.  I also found an amazing design partner, someone who understands me when I can’t get the words out of my mouth.  She can take my distracted ramblings and turn out these incredible works of art.  She makes me feel comfortable in my leadership role even when I’m terrified that making tough decisions and having difficult discussions will ruin our amazing friendship.  Without her, I don’t know what I’d do…

But even so, no one else's signature is on the papers I filed with the state, no one else is writing contracts...then re-writing them when they feel it's too harsh...then re-writing them again when they've realized an iron-clad contract is a good thing.  There's no one there when accountants need to be met, lawyers seen, accounts opened, marketing plans planned, spaces investigated…you get the picture.  At the end of the day, this business, along with the fiscal and emotional burden and success fall squarely on my shoulders.  That’s a big, terrifying responsibility.

But would I change it?  Would I abandon Goldiluxe tomorrow if given the chance for an easy, clutter-free life?  Not in a million years.  Even though I’m feeling lost and a little blue right now, I know there’s lots of amazing happiness just around the corner.  Sometimes, I just want to feel heard.

So you tell me, how do you make it work when you feel like giving up?

Hey Girl, I Found Something Glorious Today

So, I found this website today.  It's pretty great.  Here's a preview:

It's called Practical Ryan Gosling, it's totally brill and its slogan is this:

Helping brides stay sane with an extra dose of hotness.

Check it out, y'all.  Calming phrases and America's reigning supafox Ryan Gosling?!  

Now that's a lot of sugah. 

Hey, Kid: A Letter to Myself at 15

My impending birthday always makes me reflective.  This year, I spent, like six months contemplating the reality of 30.  So, I've been sitting on this for a few days, debating whether I should post it.  The more I read it, the more I love it.  So I will share.  And I might even add some pictures...


Hey, kid (don't you hate that, I always did):

First, the bad news: They aren’t bringing back Crystal Pepsi. Not ever, so let go of the dream. We did not marry Rider Strong or Rivers Cuomo. I know, right?! You should still doodle cute Weezer doodles all over your binder, though. It’s fun. Also, we are not the toast of Broadway. Lame, I know, but true. Oh, and Ricky Martin is gay. We totally called it.


Now the important stuff.


Don’t be so hard on our parents. They’re pretty amazing. They’ve put up with a lot of shizz from us over the years (ask me about our college bank account). Dad works really hard and he does what he does because he likes it. He’s also pretty brilliant at it, too. Adults do this thing where they stay at a job even though they don’t like all the aspects of it. Insane, I know.  He hates that his job takes him away so much, but it does help pay for the car you’re getting (that’s right, a car for your 16th birthday…keep an eye out in June) and everything else you have, so chill. Besides, we’re 30, and Mom is still our best friend, so what does that tell you.


Oh, by the way, when you are 18, you will be offered some rum cake. DO NOT EAT IT. It will make you sick and you will throw up all over the stairs. It will make the staircase smell like booze. Mom will think you were drinking. She will not believe that you weren’t. When she asks you again (and believe me, she will, several times, years later), she’s giving you a chance to come clean. Stick to your guns. We’ll get her yet.


While we’re on the subject, get ready for this: You will miss Nebraska so much you will feel like you can’t breathe. Never saw it coming. After high school, you will cry every time you leave Mom and Dad’s after a visit. Every time. Each time you visit it will be harder to leave and you’ll feel like your heart is in a vice grip. It sucks. But, you can’t move home every time life gets tough so stick it out.


You are beautiful. Right now. Just like this.  I wish I could be there every day to remind you. Look, I get it: nobody close to you looks like you and that’s hard. You just want to fit in.  These feelings aren’t your fault.  We do, however, live in a world obsessed with youth and beauty and these subtle messages won’t be lost on you. You will internalize it all and you will feel ugly. Every day. I wish I could tell you this gets better for us or shield you from it, but it doesn’t and I can’t. I have given up so much in the pursuit of the perfect figure, sometimes I think the only thing getting smaller is my spirit.  I would give anything to stop you from going through this.  The silver lining?: Our struggle with this makes us nicer to people…gives us empathy…which, let’s face it is an emotion we aren’t good at.

So, boys.  Oh, honey if I had the answers I'd be a millionaire.  All I can say is this: Be good to yourself.  Love yourself first. You won't find what you feel you're missing in the ice blue eyes underneath a dirty ball cap.  It never works out and you'll lose yourself trying to be someone he wants.  Also, you can say no.  Even if it goes really far, really fast.  No one gets ownership of your body but you.  Remember that.  Each and every time.

Okay. This is really important. Your 20’s are going to be…difficult at times.  However, there will be people all around you that want to help. Do not shut them out. You do not have to do it alone.  You’ll know what I mean when you get there. I wish I could explain, but you need to live through these things. You will get back up, you will be okay again and you will feel like a Phoenix when you do.


There’s lots more I want to tell you but I don’t want to ruin the surprise, so I will give you a couple of spoilers (Google it…oh, wait. Can you do that? Google things? Well, look it up anyway.) So here goes:


Hang in there for the Friends finale. It gets pretty good.
Keep your eye on the political scene. Un. Believable.
Remember to relax.
There is a hotter batman than Michael Keaton and Val Kilmer. Seriously, wait for it.
In like three years, a movie called The Matrix will come out. Go see it. It will blow your mind.

So there you have it, honey.  The next 15 years in a nutshell.  It's gonna be crazy, but you're gonna love it.

All my love,
e

Halloween Happenings

Hello, my ghoulish little Goldilous.  It's that time of year again and I could not be happier!  If you know me at all, you know that Halloween is probably my favorite holiday.  Like, if someone "sent me to a desert island with three things" kind of favorite. So what am I doing to keep the Halloween lovelight a-burnin?  Well:

1. AMC's annual Fright Fest starts Sunday (!).  Hosted by the patron saint of zombie movies, George Romero (!!).  Seriously, y'all, I wait all.  year.  for this.

2.  TCM will be showing classic horror movies (like 1969 on down) every Monday.  Both classic movie channels will be streaming classic horror online as well. Yay!

3.  My Halloween decorate-fest begins tomorrow.

and now, the bestest, most fun thing I'm doing this year is:

4.  I'm revamping my Halloween party design!  It's sooo much fun.  I completely rethink my design in order to come up with something fresh and exciting every year.  I pull everything out, see what I can reuse or, rather repurpose and then set to work creating something new.  It's a great way to keep me on my toes as a designer.

With that said, this year I wanted to go in a totally new direction.  Something full of splashy, campy goodness.  The pic above is my favorite image from my new inspiration board.  This October is packed for me, so I'm not sure I'll be able to use my design, but I can't wait to share it with all of you!  Stay tuned!

Hello, World! My Name's Goldiluxe, What's Yours?

Hello Darlings!

I've finally been pulled into the 21st Century. You may be thinking:  "But Erin, your love of Apple products, this blog-your iPad!  Don't those say, 21st Century?!"  Well, they do.  Sort of.  But what I'm talking about is much bigger!

Goldiluxe Events is now on Facebook!

What?!  That's right.  After three years, I've finally broken down and signed us up for Facebook.

So, here goes nothing, I guess...

Some Calm in the Internet Storm

So, if you're anything like me and read wedding blogs incessantly, you're probably aware of this.  Then there was this.  Basically, some couple had a wedding (albeit a thoughtless and distasteful one) and people lost their shizz.  And, in the interest of full disclosure, I should say I kinda lost my shizz a little bit, as well.  Because, in my opinion having an oh, so awesome time while making light of the struggle of millions all over the world is tasteless.  Abject poverty isn't fun.  It isn't romantic and it isn't cute.  But I kept my damn mouth shut.  Which is another post...

My point is, if I may be frank, this wedding started an Internet shit show. Once that fire was a'blazin, the flames were fanned. I am still collecting my thoughts and in response to those of you who've asked my opinion: I plan to throw my two cents in later this week.

In the meantime, I suggest you read this post by the mastermind behind the Offbeat Empire, Ariel Meadow Stallings.  It's well written and thought provoking.  Then, we'll discuss this issue here.

Some News...

Hello, darlings!  How I've missed you!  These last few weeks have been super busy for us here at Goldiluxe.  We have been designing our little tushies off with no end in sight.  Sadly, that means I have neglected you.  Well, let me be honest when I say that I have sooo many amazing things to share with you! 

Now, I know that I have, quite possibly, the most fabulously stylish and creative readers in the history of ever!  I know that, you know that and now I want to share your soiree brilliance with the whole blog-o-sphere!  So I'm sooo happy to introduce to you a new, regular segment:

Luxe Life

I want to see what you've been up to, so we are finally open for submissions!  No event is to small!  While our new electronic infrastructure is being redesigned, I suggest you get on over to Twitter, follow me and message me for details!  For now, you can click on the "Luxe Life" tab for guidelines.

I cannot wait to see what you have up your little sleeves!

{Spooky Inspiration}

I have Tim Burton on the brain today. I really do. I. Love. Him! Always have. If Helena Bonham Carter (and The Hubbs, for that matter) wasn't standing in my way, I would marry him myself.

I am obsessed with the idea of the Tim Burton inspired wedding. So much is good about that idea. But (and this is a HUGE but), only if it is done with taste. This is a theme that could go from chic to campy in one overly taffeta-ed instant. Ahh, but that is fodder for another post my lovelies...another post at another time.

So today I leave you with this.


And this.I'm especially in love with this picture because I see so much emotion. I love that the skeleton looks to be in despair, with the way it's turned from us and hunched into its hands. Loving this.

Happy Hallowedding, everyone!

Photos found here and property of Harper's Bazaar.

The Business of Marriage: Top 6 Newlywed Money Mistakes

Disclaimer: The Business of Marriage series is just meant to be a collection of my observations and conclusions of how people spend. Most of the information will of course be based on The Hubbs and I. After all, we're still learning how to be married, not to mention identifying our financial mistakes. I thought it might be nice to chronicle them here. Maybe it will save some of you the crazy-making money fuelled arguments The Hubbs and I stomped through.

I know, Holy Matrimony is supposed to be a light, fun place to go for all things wedding. However, part of a planner's job (the most important part, if you ask me) is to help two different people, nay, two different SPENDERS come together and create something beautiful. During the wedding process you have a lot of time to observe how two people spend and how different their money habits are. It can be a big eye opener. Hence, this series.

We all know that the finances of the newlywed span everything under the sun, but from what I've seen, I think there are six major pitfalls that every couple can avoid. So, sit back and enjoy....if "enjoy" is really even the word.

1. Keeping Money Issues Hush-Hush. A HUGE no-no. "Mo money, mo problems", as they say. Finance starts nearly all major arguments between newlyweds. Ugly, but true. So some couple decide that avoid the arguments, the solution is to avoid the topic completely. Au contraire, mon ami. Communication is the key to any successful long-term relationship so it stands to reason that airing your dirty financial laundry is no exception.

In a perfect world, all couples would have this conversation before swishing down the aisle. I mean, there are awesome surprises that await you ("By the way doll, I happen to be fluent in Mandarin") and there are not-so-awesome surprises ( Hey babe, I forgot to tell you- I just bought an H2, fully loaded. It rocks, but now I'm $100,000 in debt"). Full disclosure is the name of the game.

2. Being Budget Shy. Okay, this is a big one, too. Let's face it, you're forcing two spending and saving habits into one household. If you don't know what you're doing this can be a lot like trying to shove 50 lbs of manure into a 10 lb bag. A hot, wet mess.

The solution? Simple, well, "simple-esque". If you had a budget before the "I do's" (5 points for you, by the way) you have to throw it out and make a new one with your spouse. Include both of your income, debts and monthly expenses. This will help ensure that neither you or your savings account will suffer.

You need to write down fixed expenses (rent, car payments, insurance premiums etc.). I also suggest adding a monthly payment to your savings account (treat it like a fixed expense). Then write down all of your flexible expenses ( groceries, miscellaneous expenses, ATM withdrawals etc). Track your spending for a few months and see where your money goes. It will help you find the places for financial improvement.

3. Letting One Person Wear the Financial Crown. So, after the dress is cleaned and the linens returned, the real work starts. Who does the taxes? Who pays the bills? What account should the automatic payments come from? Ugh. So many decisions. What to do? One of you may emerge as the financial leader, you may share the responsibility or you may trade off each month. None of these are bad choices as long as both of you are OK with the decision.

You both should know exactly what's going on with your money and you should both understand the day to day dealings of your new household. Neither of you should feel excluded. Likewise, you should know each others account information in case something should happen. Each month, get together for a little financial romp. Talk about the state of things, go over your budget, go over expenses, and review your savings.

Please make sure, if you choose to combine your assets, major purchases and savings accounts are in both of your names. This will help the both of you have access to them and maintain a credit rating. You don't want to learn during a divorce that the car and savings account weren't really in your name.

4. Letting Debt Follow You Down the Aisle. If one of you brings debt into the marriage; it will belong to both of you. Just develop a plan to pay it off. Keep in mind, should you decide to combine your finances, debt will hurt the credit score of the other person. This may make it difficult for one or both of you to get credit later. Keep existing debt in one name only. Also, don't go into debt just to pull off the wedding of your dreams. Not a good idea.

5. Making Mountains Of Molehills. Compromise, Compromise, Compromise. Try not to turn every financial hiccup into a verbal boxing match. Little things do add up and they will get in the way of financial growth, but pick your battles. Try to work a little "mad money" into your budget. This is money the two of you can spend however you wish. On the big stuff, always consult one another. It will go a long way in the long run.

6. Living Without a Contingency Plan. No one likes to dwell on the unpleasant aspects of life, but unfortunately these things can sneak up on you like a bad tan line. Assess your emergency money stash. The rule is (according to Oprah), every couple should try to have enough money to cover three to six months of living expenses. If this figure seems excessive, then you need to make sure you have plenty of insurance coverage. Life, auto, renters or homeowners. Married without a pre-nup?? Draft a post-nup with your lawyers....it's never a bad idea to protect the financial interests each of you brought to the marriage. (Sounds harsh, I know, but that's life. If you can't talk about finances with your SO, what can you talk about?) Likewise, get together and draft a living will to properly express division of property in the event of passing.

There you have it! I know finances are serious, but they are important. Not to mention most arguments between couples are started by them. I just wanted to give you a little leg up on all of that. My next post, will be fun. I promise.

So Much to Say......and Do

Hey, kids! I know all has been relatively quiet the last few days, but me oh my how busy I have been!
"So, what's going on with that crazy blogger?!", you say. Well....

I have been researching a new post and furiously writing away. It's almost done and I am thrilled to say I will post it this afternoon. I've rounded up this week's Etsy finds....also comin' at 'cha this afternoon. My pictures from the last wedding I went to are almost all finished, edited and ready to be posted (in a couple of days) and I put the finishing touches on a card box I made for a friend of mine. In other news, I started some renovation on the apartment. I've been spray painting things like a mad woman and trying to get my house ready for a party we are having next week. Whew....

So, just hang on tight and away we go!

Away So Long!

Hello everyone!

I am so excited to be back at it! The last couple weeks have just been crazy! I have a lot to share with you.

The Hubbs and I attended a wedding and I have pictures and some commentary to share. Also, a few words about wedding party attire will be coming soon!

I'll get cracking on it today!

Kisses!
Erin

Arrrgh! What to Wear to a Wedding!

The Hubbs and I are attending a wedding very soon. The happy couple are friends from The Hubbs days as a New Berlin Eisnenhower Lion. The groomie stood up in our wedding. The lovebirds are cute as a button. Great people!

"So what's the problem?!", you ask. I don't have anything to wear. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Buh. Sometimes I feel like my life would be so much easier if I weren't so fussy. So while browsing the virtual racks at Nordstrom and Macy's, I decided to put in my two cents about appropriate wedding guest attire.

Fancy Pants
I love a swanky, ultra-hip formal wedding. I do. But I believe there are some general rules one must follow when dressing for it. First and foremost, don't outdress the bride. I include dressing all in the color of the wedding dress in this rule. Believe you me, if someone had shown up to our wedding in the same color dress as me I would have scratched her ever-lovin' eyes out! It's my number one no-no for sure. After obeying that rule, feel free to go big with the glam! I am a huge advocate for silk, beads, sequins (tastefully done of course) and all things that glitter. Wear what you feel beautiful in. Age appropriateness is a big issue with me, as well. Let's remember we aren't going to prom or a second grade girl's birthday party or a brothel (please pardon my tone!). Dress for your wonderfully unique body type, wear your age like a badge of honor and you will be a hit every time!

A guest at our wedding wore a 20's inspired sailor dress in a lovely yellowish green tone. The hem hit at the knee and was whimsically asymmetrical. She accented it with the most beautiful light yellow buckled heels and necklaces that just hit the navel. She looked comfortable, stylish and radiant. The current object of my covetous heart is this little Badgley Mischka number pictured at #1. I am lovin' blue right now! Also, notice the beaded natural waist line. Stunning!



Semi-Formal Chic
The bulk of the weddings I've been to are semi-formal affairs. I think this is a great way to go, I find most guests are far more comfortable when "Black Tie" doesn't appear on the invite. But, let me remind you not to mistake semi-formal for casual. Aim for a put-together ensemble that is both tasteful and slightly fancier than your everyday look. I love bright, bold colors in the spring and summer and tend to save the darker colors for weddings later in the year. Plums, yellows and shades of blue and green look fresh with grays and neutrals. Consider silk georgette and fluid rayon fabrics for a breezy look at any pre-dusk soiree. After dark, you may want to head for a little more sophistication. I love cocktail dresses paired with fitted jackets and bold accessories. Right now, this Kay Unger silk halter dress (aka #2) seems like a dream. First of all, pure silk?! Oh my, and what a lovely color, not to mention the leopard print is so soft, it barely seems leopard-y. My favorite part? The halter neckline and banded waist, of course! This style looks great on just about everyone.

A Causual Fete
Romantic. Whimsical. Breathtaking. These are three words that come to mind when I think of casual weddings. Garden settings, beautiful beaches, and municipal parks are just some of the places crafty couples are getting hitched. The mood is always joyful and lighthearted. One's attire should compliment the theme. I reccommend cotton sateen, linen and silk chiffon in dreamy silhouettes. Nanette Lepore hit the mark with the lovely belted a-line dress at #3. To me, it's wonderfully fluid and the shape is perfect for every body type. Dresses aren't your thing? Mix it up in a smart pantsuit crafted in festive colors. #4 is gorgeous! I love the wide leg pant and dramatic, asymmetrical neckline. Bold prints and bright colors are beautiful and today's styles are all about looking lovely. All in all make sure you're dressed appropriately. No jeans, please.

Okay, I feel a little better now. Had to get that off my chest. It doesn't change the fact that I have nothing to wear. Oh, well-back to the closet I go. Wish me luck, all!

Because She's Your Mother, That's Why!

Crossposted from Renegade Soiree

This comes to us from the ever so stylish Twig and Thistle. Seattle based print designer and all around design genius, Kathleen is the brain behind this wonderful company. The blog is amazing! This adorable little doorknocker is perfect for the busy Mom (and aren't they all?!) You can download it here. I suggest printing it on brightly colored card stock. The doorknocker will fit nicely inside a #10 envelope (my favorite #10 envelopes of all time are from Paper Source). I think this gift would be best paired with something sinful (Godiva, anyone?) for that special lady in your life to enjoy with her feet up.

Let's all take the time to remember our mothers this weekend. They've given us life, love, and their never ending support as we bumble through our lives desperately trying to become half the person they are so effortlessly. I for one don't know where I'd be without my Mom behind me 100%. So, with all they give us everyday, let's make sure we give Sunday, May 10th to them.

I love you, Mom!

Photo credit: Twig and Thistle Blog